The Blog Squad

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

My Good Deed for the Day

Hello, friends. My sincere apologies for my absence this summer, but I am on something of an unforeseen sabbatical. It never occurred to me that once school (in my case, preschool) closed and my daily schedule actually became a day-follows-night-follows-day marathon of fetching popsicles and wiping … oh, well, you know, that I would lose the several hours a week I normally take to post to the blog. Anyway, I just couldn’t pass this up today.

So there I am parking my car at the Ukrop’s at Sycamore Square when I notice something stuck into the driver’s window of the car beside mine. In big black letters it reads “W.W.J.D.” Oh, OK, I think. But on closer inspection, I see that it doesn’t say “What would Jesus do?” but “Who Will Jesus Damn?”

And then it gives a list. The Hypocrites. The Unforgiving. Homosexuals. Fornicators. The Wicked. The Covetous. Backbiters. Haters of God. Boasters. Inventors of evil things. (Toy packaging, perhaps?). The Unrighteous. The Effeminate (does that count women?) Drunkards (Goodbye, Mel). The Abominable (snowman?). Whoremongers. Sorcerers. And so on.

I looked around to see if these things were stuck on all the windows and I saw no more. Not one. I looked to see if the white car had any overtly evil (read: liberal) bumper stickers, but no. Something, though, had made this kind person who left this thing deeply concerned for the mortal soul of sinner who drives the white car.

Under the list of the damned, it said this: “Wait a minute! Isn’t Jesus all about love and warm feelings?”

Then turn it over and it reads:

“Perhaps this isn’t the Jesus you’ve heard about. Maybe, just maybe, the Savior from the Bible isn’t all about warm fuzzies.”

It goes on from there to quote Revelation -- “His eyes were as a flame of fire … clothed with a vesture dipped in blood … out of his mouth goeth a sharp sword … smite the nations … rod of iron … fierceness and wrath of Almighty God …”

Oh, heavens. Then:

“You see, Jesus isn’t just a teddy bear (really, you can make one at Build-A-Bear!) kind of guy to be ignored or simply mention as a curse word. He will one day be your judge. He has all the evidence he needs to damn your soul to hell, and that day may be just one heartbeat away. ...

“Things aren’t looking too good for you friend. There is only one way to escape your just and impending damnation. Repent of you [sic] sins. …”

And on from there. It gives a Powhatan P.O. Box and a website which I shall not put on here, because I don’t want to be responsible for a single additional hit.

How do I remember precisely what was on that card? Because I took it. That’s right, my good deed for the day was to spare that person coming out of Ukrop’s the intense rage they would have felt all day. That, my friends, makes me a thief. Condemned to damnation in 1 Cor. 6:10.

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