Please, Mommy, buy me some books! I want to be just like Paris Hilton!

You know that weird half-dream/half-awake state you are in when your alarm clock goes off and your brain incorporates what you hear on the radio into the dream you are already having? There must be a word or phrase for that. (Any suggestions, you clever wordsmiths? Reveridio? Radio Eye Movement?) That's what happened to me this morning when our alarm clock went off at about 6:25 a.m. and I started dreaming about gold-plated chocolates, which may or may not have been an actual topic of conversation between morning DJs Jack and Linda.

If you are like me, as you start to wake up just a tiny bit you hear things that make no sense whatsoever:

".... the greatest polka hits of The Clash."
"I-95 shut down when a swarm of tree frogs ..."
"Tom Cruise will marry Katie Holmes next year ..."

So I'm assuming that's what my brain was doing this morning when the news person started talking about a program for kids that may or may not have been called Reading, Writing and Limos. It rewards kids who improve their reading skills with a ride in a limo. Pretty cool. But then they quoted the program's spokesperson, who may or may not truly have been named Betsy Ross — remember, I'm still technically sleeping — as saying (as best as my sleeping brain can reconstruct): "We want kids to know that if they are good readers they can become a celebrity."

See? I surely got that all mixed up in my dreamy state. Obviously, she must have said something like, "We want kids to know that if they are good readers the potential for success is unlimited in whatever career they choose, be it education or public service, science or business, or even the arts and entertainment."

If anyone at B103 is reading this, feel free to correct me on that quote. I must have gotten it wrong ... right?

Oh my God!