Virginia's Royal Moment

Thousands flocked into Virginia this week for an event filled with pageantry, tradition and excitement — many decked out in their finest to pay tribute to their idol. Yep, it's Race Week in Richmond. What did you think I meant?

Actually, about that other event ... You can be a total cynic about it (monarchies are dead, oppressive, blah, blah, blah), but still — the old girl gave a great speech (limp ending, but otherwise powerful and humble). First Lady Anne Holton wisely decided to forgo the hat (she looked lovely), and Sabrina Squire rocked a tan wide-brimmed hat with a giant silk bow.

But none of them could upstage the really Grande Dame of the day, Virginia herself. She looked simply radiant. (Of course, she has had some work done...)

A side note on the day: This blog pointed out a few days ago some etiquette tips for dealing with the queen. No. 2 was this: "Don’t talk with your hands — this includes the 'thumbs up' gesture, which evidently is considered obscene in many European countries." Now check out Gov. Kaine big as life on the front of the Times-Dispatch this morning. Looks as if he got so excited he spontaneously broke into the cool jerk.

And on to other topics ...

Chesterfield Town Center uses a clever little tagline in its positioning against the open-air Short Pump Town Center and Stony Point Fashion Park: "We've got you covered." Clever. However, they might consider tweaking it a bit. I happened to be there Wednesday evening during that big downpour and no less than four giant red tubs were positioned around the mall to catch the leaks from the vaulted skylight ceiling. How about "Slippery When Wet?"

R. Kelly has announced he's written "Rise Up," a song of healing for Virginia Tech. Yes, the man who gave us "Feelin' On Yo Booty" and "I Like the Crotch on You" will attempt to heal the commonwealth's and the nation's wounds with his supple lyricism. After all who can forget "Strutting past, switching that ass while I'm on the phone/Cutting up tomatoes, fruits and vegetables and potatoes/Girl, you look so sexy while you're doing the damn thang, I want sex in the kitchen over by the stove/Put you on the counter by the buttered rolls/Hands on the table, on your tippy toes/We'll be making love like the restaurant was closed." Powerful stuff.

-- Janet Giampietro